feel disguested with myself. ate pizza at lunch. and a cookie for a snack. what is wrong with me? i dont want to eat but i feel like if i dont my friends will start to figure everything out…
sit.think about it.
i just dont understand. why do i have friends that make fun of me but say they are just kidding…i take everything to heart…i am already broken. maybe they dont know that. but i am broken. i am on the verge of completely falling apart. i slightly fall apart every now and then, more and more as time goes by…i dont want a pity party…i just wish people would realize that every little joke…hurts. yes, i am a hypocrite. i do say hurtful thing to others/about others. but i have gotten better, i try to be nicer and say nicer things…because i know how it feels and im taking it out on him. i take out all of my frustrations on him..i love him and he loves me more than anyone could ever love me. yet i put him through hell and back because everyone else hurts me…i just dont know what im supposed to do anymore…i feel like im drowning. that feeling where your trying to scream for help and get someone to just see that you need help but no one an hear you, no one sees you.